letting go
As a military wife, I have learned to always expect the unexpected.
From the very beginning, my husband has kept me on my toes. One day, he walks in the apartment only to announce that he did it - he enlisted in the Army. Next, it was getting a phone call learning he fell out of the sky (not on purpose, but his parachute didn’t help). Later, Putin invaded, and my husband’s unit was the first to deploy for the border of Ukraine, leaving me a single (and pregnant) mother. During the end of our time with the Army came the greatest surprise - that we were getting out and moving back to our hometown.
Since then, it’s been a beautiful chapter full of time spent with our families. There were many times I thought this would never happen. I felt stuck and insecure of our future as a family and in our marriage. Army life is difficult, but honestly - that’s a massive understatement. It becomes the essence of your life when your spouse is active duty, thus, you are constantly at the whim of everyone else besides you and your spouse.
That, my friends, is very hard to come to terms with - relinquishing all control.
Until we think of losing control in other ways. Allowing control to belong to someone other than yourself can be freeing. The intentional act of letting go opens doors, because we actively choose to close some. I say forget the window - we are capable of manifesting a door. Big doors! Like for a garage, or warehouse, or an airplane hanger.
When we give some of our power to a power greater than ourselves, we are making a choice. In this lies strength and capability. We may not like our options, but we always have a choice.
Today, my husband (yet again) surprised me by changing his major from Engineering to study Nursing, throwing a curve in our plan. True to our five years of marriage, we will try our best to go with the flow. I’m choosing to let go of what I can, and to only take action where I can make a difference. For everything else, I end my meditations with this:
May I have the courage to see your path before me and the strength to follow it.
What choice will you make?
